On Thursday, Cutie and I finally closed the door on us. I pleaded my case for the last time and he explained for the last time. I cried for the last time. And he held me for the last time. Twas hella painful and I wondered how I would get through a whole day of work on Friday. I hardly managed all morning. Calmed down into the afternoon and was all perked up by the evening, looking forward to dancing off all the bad vibes. I got my face made up and headed downtown, hoping for a slight case of amnesia.
I figured with some liquid courage and professional make-up, I could do like the alchies and
fake it til (I) make it
I put my hurt on the back burner and for the first hour I danced as though my life depended on it… Fortunately I got to a point where I didn’t have to pretend anymore coz the DJ started playing some decent music. And then when it was time to leave.. I was keen to stay but P was keen to bounce so we did but if I could, I would have delayed the whole thing. Coz I was not keen to got to the neighbouring club and deal with ego-trippin’ shlebs…
We swindle our way into the VIP coz we hadn’t really planned on being there. And all the people I’d rather not see were in there. Naturally. Thank goodness for the open bar. Now that made me smile. I was also keen to head to the main section of the venue with the regular folk so that my interrupted freestyle choreography could resume… coz I was sure that I was not about to meet a new dude… I might score a make-out session but really meet a good man… hadn’t even occurred to me, not in my frame of mind. In fact when I bumped into Shorty… I started to think okay cool.. .I ain’t gotta deal with a new nigga, just deal with the one that fkd up before. No expectations there.
But lo and behold- his friend started hollering at me. And I’m looking at this dude like…excuse me homie but do I know you? But this nigga did not let up. And I ended up spending the next three to four hours with him. Talking n stuff… Yeah that other stuff too. But the crazy bit is that he kept saying he knows who I am but I had no freakin clue. In fact, everybody knew who the hell he was but me! I must have gotten like five thousand different description of what he does… the most accurate being that he is a SOCIALITE!? lol! ait so before I know it… I’m feelin’ this dude… and I even start to think that maybe gettin’ to know him wouldn’t be sucha bad idea… but then I started thinkin’ wtf.. I just parted ways with the guy who was supposedly the man of my dreams… moving on so quickly? is that right? shouldn’t I get used to being alone first so that I don’t go into this with madd issues?
anyway..excuse me for getting ahead of myself… but this nigga was already asking me out on this very night! Twas hard not to get carried away… He was like we should be together and date and stuff coz he wants to be my man! Woah! Nigga! slow yo roll! I don’t even know who you are… but I’ll admit I’m keen to find out… coz he was able to do the impossible… get me out of a ditch! I had fun..lots of it… and Cutie wasn’t even a factor.. how’s that for interesting?
Question is..is this for real? or some sort of crazy punk’d scene? it seems way to easy and I know that heartbreak is never this easy… so now what…
well, let’s give this dude a pseudonym for starters.. how about ‘Perkie’? Coz he managed to perk me up..plus he’s perked up…if you catch my drift….
Actually… let’s call him ‘Chocolate’ coz he has this awesome, glowing brown skin that I’m a complete sucker for.. plus I’m feeling some heartburn… it makes me forget his gold cap for a second. Yeah, I forgot to mention that…and hopefully he’ll get rid of it… jus in case things get serious.. so there you go… I’ve met somebody..;lready.. and I’m tryin not to like him but there’s huge potential (for the biggest distraction [n more])coz he’s dope. But before we get ahead of ourselves..let’s see what the new week brings… after a our text chat last night… during which I passed out.. mm… I know..not very nice of me…
Also had to deal with Shorty hollerin’ at me when he could see that Chocolate was tryna holla! How wack! And I had no clue how to deal with it coz Shorty n I have a past and I can’t be rude to him coz I just met a random dude. Twas super wierd and conflicting so even though I could see that Shorty was jus tryna cock-block his buddy out of sheer pretence not interest (he even called the following night to check if I got home all right- dodgy mothatrucka that one and I told him as much! And of cos he pleaded ignorance! Nigga please! Nobody lookin for a KanYe interuption here!), I didn’t know how to deal with it coz I had no clue how to include Chocolate in the conversation which was totally irrelevant to him. At least I figured as much coz I dunno what this nigga does!
So the following day, I had to call n apologise coz truth is, as he kindly pointed out, if the roles had been reversed ie he had been ignoring me in front of his ex-flame.. I woulda flipped. He forgave me and later on, last night…he texted me and told me how much he missed me… I had passed out on the couch so I had to apologise for the delay and let him know that he had been on my mind for much of the day… coz of Jill Scott’s sweet words… four minutes later, he asked which song (Not That Crazy).. by that time… I had passed out.. After church…I tried to explain to a nigga that I failed to reply timeously coz of my chronic exhaustion… he has yet to reply. I think we may be facing a subtle pay-back…
Regardless…I’ve decided to now extended this blog to the whole year… in fact let’s break down the countdowns to mini-countdowns that include what’s happening in my life. If Choc n I really do happen to make it work ie get over my excessive apologies… I am gonna go about this properly. I will follow Steve Harvey’s rules, including the 90 DAY rule. And I will leave if I start hearing some dodgy things. This time, there is no room for funny behaviour coz I am wide awake from the get go.
If nigga doesn’t holla back by the end of the day.. I will take that as a big fat hint! And we won’t need the 90 day clock anymore. Plus that will probably kill the plans we made for Friday.. yeah..yesterday already, Nigga was on some, watchu doing on Friday… very cute….I was like I dunno..it’s SATURDAY so he insisted that we stay in touch despite my ‘working 24 hours a day’..that’s what he calls it… it may as well be exactly that!
365 Days... and even Beyond... 
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